Je, Mungu anajali maisha ya kijana Na 4? (Does God Care About the Life of a Young Person? Na 4)
Session Four: Why Is It So Difficult to Find the Right Wife or Husband Today?
God has never promised to give us a perfect fiancée, but He does guide us toward a suitable husband or wife. Courtship and engagement are simply stages that lead to marriage.
In this session, we will examine the story of Isaac and Rebekah, from courtship to marriage, as recorded in Genesis 24. When discussing the right spouse, I am not referring to a perfect spouse. Every human being has weaknesses and limitations. These differences often create opportunities for mutual support and growth. God frequently brings people together so that they can complement one another.
Not every principle will apply equally to every situation, but the following guidelines provide a helpful foundation for making wise decisions.
Reasons Why Finding the Right Spouse Has Become Difficult Today (Genesis 24).
1. Parents Viewing Marriage as an Economic Opportunity
Genesis 24:1: “Now Abraham was old, well advanced in years, and the Lord had blessed Abraham in all things.”
When the time came for Isaac to find a wife, Abraham was already blessed both spiritually and materially. He was not seeking a bride to improve the family’s financial position but to establish a meaningful and God-honoring relationship.
Unfortunately, some parents place financial considerations above genuine love and compatibility, leading their children into difficult marriages. In some cases, excessive dowry demands become a major obstacle, causing the breakdown of relationships and engagements. Young people who lack strong spiritual guidance may choose to abandon their relationships because the financial expectations seem impossible to meet.
2. Failing to Involve Parents Before Beginning a Relationship
Genesis 24:2: “So Abraham said to the oldest servant of his house, who ruled over all that he had, ‘Please, put your hand under my thigh.’”
Many young people begin romantic relationships without first seeking the counsel, guidance, and blessing of their parents or guardians. They only approach their parents after they have already chosen someone and then try to persuade them to approve the relationship.
While parents may not make the final decision, their wisdom and experience can provide valuable insight. Involving them early in the process can help identify potential concerns and strengthen the foundation of the relationship.
If you wait until your wedding day to seek your parents’ blessing, after excluding them from the journey of finding a spouse, you may miss the encouragement, support, and guidance that their involvement could have provided from the beginning.
Je, Mungu anajali maisha ya kijana Na 4?
Kipindi cha nne: Kwa nini inakuwa vigumu leo kupata mke/mume sahihi?
Mungu hajaahidi popote kwamba atakupatia mchumba mwema bali mume au mke mwema. Uchumba ni mchakato tu kuelekea kwenye ndoa.
Nitatumia habari ya Isaka na Rebeka ilivyokuwa tangu uchumba hadi ndoa katika Mwanzo 24. Hata hivyo ninapozungumzia MWENZI SAHIHI sina maana ya MWENZI MKAMILIFU.
Bado mwanadamu ana mapungufu yake ambayo yanaweza kutumiwa kama fursa za kuhitajiana. Mungu anaunganisha watu ili wakamilishane (complement each other).
Sio lazima kanuni zote zimfae kila mtu. Huu ni mwongozo tu kwa kuzingatia mambo ya msingi.
Sababu za ugumu wa kupata mwenzi sahihi (Mwa 24).
1. Wazazi kuchukulia ndoa kama mtaji wa kiuchumi
Mst 1: “Basi Ibrahimu alikuwa mzee mwenye miaka mingi, na Bwana alikuwa amembariki Ibrahimu katika vitu vyote.”
Wakati Ibrahimu anahitaji mwanae apate mke sahihi alikuwa ameshabarikiwa kiroho na kiuchumi. Hapakuhitajika mkaza mwana kwa sababu za kiuchumi bali za kimahusiano.
Wapo wazazi wamewatumbukiza watoto kwenye matatizo kwa sababu tu ya njaa au kuthamini pesa kuliko upendo na mahusiano.
Wapo wanaotaja mahari kubwa sana ambayo inapelekea vijana wasiomjua Mungu kuamua kutoroshana au uchumba kuvunjika.
2. Kutoshirikisha wazazi kabla ya kuanzisha mahusiano
Mst 2: “Ibrahimu akamwambia mtumishi wake, mzee wa nyumba yake, aliyetawala vitu vyake vyote, Tafadhali uutie mkono wako chini ya paja langu.”
Vijana wengi wanaotaka mwenzi wa maisha, hawatafuti ushauri na baraka za wazazi kabla ya kumuona wanayempenda. Wanasubiri mpaka wamuone ndipo wanawaona wazazi ili kuwashawishi wamkubali.
Ukisubiri wazazi wakuachilie siku ya arusi wakati hukuwashirikisha kabla ya kupata mke au mume, kuna baraka utazikosa.
Dr Lawi Mshana, Facilitator and Mentor, +255712924234, Tanzania
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